Friday, June 26, 2020

Letters to the Lost (Letters to the Lost, #1) by Brigid Kemmerer

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1681190087/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&SubscriptionId=1MGPYB6YW3HWK55XCGG2&linkCode=ll1&tag=doyoudogear-20&linkId=91231f2210f70447eaa443cd294a34f6&language=en_US
Synopsis (via Goodreads): Juliet Young always writes letters to her mother, a world-traveling photojournalist. Even after her mother's death, she leaves letters at her grave. It's the only way Juliet can cope.

Declan Murphy isn't the sort of guy you want to cross. In the midst of his court-ordered community service at the local cemetery, he's trying to escape the demons of his past.

When Declan reads a haunting letter left beside a grave, he can't resist writing back. Soon, he's opening up to a perfect stranger, and their connection is immediate. But neither Declan nor Juliet knows that they're not actually strangers. When life at school interferes with their secret life of letters, sparks will fly as Juliet and Declan discover truths that might tear them apart.


"If she was a firecracker, spreading light across the sky, I'm a lit match, going dark before doing much of anything at all."
I finally got around to reading Letters to the Lost after really enjoying both A Curse So Dark and Lonely & A Heart So Fierce and Broken by Kemmerer. It was also a buddy read with Karen from For What It's Worth, and counts towards my Read the Alphabet Challenge since June is K&L! Unfortunately, this book didn't meet my expectations, and left me with a very unsatisfying conclusion.

There are several sticky notes peppered throughout this book, and tackling them all might take too long, so I'll just touch on the ones that stood out the most. Right off the bat Juliet has a thought that made me stop and take notes. She was walking to her car in the dark and hears a man cough nearby. How was able to distinguish gender based on a cough? She can't see where the noise came from, but that's immediately her assumption.

Juliet is also very judgmental of both Declan and Rev despite not knowing anything about them. She's heard rumors about the two, but she didn't actually have a reason to think, "He's that freak loner who sits in the back of every class and never talks to anyone." This is just one comment of many, and while she does grow a teeny tiny bit throughout the book, this is still how she views people. She made a comment about only seeing a snapshot of a person, but refuses to try and see the whole picture herself. I really didn't like Juliet or agree with her thoughts and actions. I thought she was a cruel character that was consumed by her grief, and unwilling to give people the benefit of the doubt.

You might think that sounds harsh, but she had similar thoughts about her father. Someone who has always been there for her. "I look at him. He's so perfectly average it makes me wonder what my mother ever saw in him." He would do something nice for her, and she would dismiss his kindness and feel annoyed by his efforts. I also don't understand why she felt like she had to mentally knock him down over and over again. She often referred to him as being plain and "beige," yet saw her mother as "vibrant" and full of color. I hated the comparisons. They were cruel and unfair.

Later she wants to blame Declan for something because of who she thinks he is. She wants him to be responsible for murder, because it would give her closure and make her feel better. She didn't stop to consider what that would mean for Declan. She didn't even give him the benefit of the doubt. She was quick to judge and blame him despite being given the opportunity to get to know him. "It's him. It has to be him." Not to mention how unhealthy their relationship (whatever they had) was. They would yell at each other, verbally cut one another down, and then suddenly feel attracted? "Despite all the anger, the aggression, electricity sparks between us." NO. Their relationship was unhealthy from the start. When Declan wrote on her letter, he definitely overstepped and should have apologized, but he ended up making her feel bad instead. How does that happen???

I also loathed Alan (Declan's stepfather) and Abby (his mother). They were so abusive. At one point Rev says, "Maybe I think his stepfather shouldn't be starting battles with him," and I wholeheartedly agree. Alan felt the need to challenge Declan constantly. That is terrible parenting! His mom just let Alan do whatever he wanted, even though she could clearly see how hurt her son was by his words and actions. She was too passive and uninvolved when it came to her son, and I don't think I can forgive that. Yes, she was grieving, but she shouldn't have blamed any of that on her son. If anything, she should have apologized for putting him in a horrible situation to begin with. He shouldn't have had to live with so much guilt, and thinking that something so devastating was all his fault. I hated how one conversation seemed to change the dynamics of their family, and wish Declan had been taken in by Frank or Rev's parents. He shouldn't have lived in that environment for as long as he did, and then Alan saying it was all because they were "worried" about Declan? I don't think so. Not good enough. 

Alan constantly put Declan down, unfairly compared him to his father, challenged him on everything, made his life as hard as possible, and frequently threatened to have him sent away. He didn't try to understand Declan or meet him halfway, he just wanted to prove that he was the boss and his word was law. It kills me that no one stepped in on Declan's behalf. No wonder his anger and resentment festered and made him aggressive. He was being attacked in his own home by an adult that should've known better. Alan should have been better. A better example. A better father figure. A better everything. His mother shouldn't have sat on the sidelines and watched as events unfolded. She should have been an active participant and an ally. She should have talked to her son before getting remarried. She should have talked to him period. 

Back to Juliet... she was so hot and cold when it came to Declan. They're both argumentative and abrasive in their interactions, but then suddenly she'd "walk into fire if he asked right now." Where did all of this love and affection come from? I'm not saying they weren't attracted to each other, because in a really convoluted way, they were. However, this sudden infatuation seemed to come on in a hurry, and I wasn't able to get behind their newfound feelings. She said she never hated him, but there was definitely contempt on her part, and a strong dose of dislike. I think they would have been better off as friends. There was too much between them–too much anger and hurt–for them to just simply forget and move on.

Speaking of friends, Rowan and Brandon were just as dismissive of Rev and Declan. They called them "losers" and even Rowan's mon thought of Rev as a "vampire." WHY? Why were they so callous and cruel? Juliet rarely stood up for or defended them (only once that I can remember), because she was often thinking the same thing. I hated that. I hated her. UGH, I hated almost everyone in this book. They all failed in one way or another. I did like Rev and Declan, but I think the two of them really need to talk about their issues before they're swallowed by them.

You might be thinking I hated this book, but that's not necessarily true. I hated the characters. However, that doesn't mean they didn't behave authentically, because people aren't always going to make the best decisions (for themselves or others), and grief impacts people in different ways. If Declan's stepfather and mother had been held accountable for their actions (maybe if Frank or Rev's parents had told someone), then I might have liked this one more. Unfortunately, the story is neatly wrapped by the end, and that's the part that felt unrealistic to me. There were no consequences for people's actions, when there definitely should have been. (★★★☆☆)

34 comments:

  1. This one seems to be a too perfect world if that makes any sense. Everything seems to be just a bit inconsequential. Kudos for sticking with your challenge though!

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    1. It does make sense! I felt like the characters weren't held responsible for their actions, and what sort of message does that send? You can bully someone until they break, but it's all okay if you say you were just worried about them? No. I liked the story itself, but not how it concluded. :)

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  2. I am glad the characters felt and acted authentic even if they were unlikable.

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    1. I liked the story as a whole, but disliked the characters themselves. It's great that they made realistic decisions, but that doesn't mean I have to agree with them. :)

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  3. I haven't read the first novel but I really enjoyed the second book. I need to try this one as well now

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    1. I've heard really great things about the second book, and I'm looking forward to reading it in the future! You'll have to let me know what you think of this one when you get around to it!

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  4. This is when the real talent of an author stands out when you can still say nice things about the novel even if you can't either identify or like the characters. Very in depth and great review.

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    1. Thank you! I don't want people to assume I didn't like the book, because I did. I just didn't agree with some of the choices the characters made. It's hard for me to love a book when I can't identify with the people I'm reading about, but that doesn't mean it wasn't an accurate portrayal. I'm sure there are people out there that can relate to Juliet and Declan, but I wasn't one of them.

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  5. Sorry it didn't work for you. I loved this book, though that departure towards the end there felt a bit out of place for me.

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    1. It's not that it didn't work for me, I just didn't like the way Juliet treated her dad, or the way she and her friends talked about others (mostly Declan and Rev). I thought they were very judgmental and unwilling to look past rumors and gossip. The ending though... that was really unexpected and not totally believable.

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  6. Sorry this one didn't work for you. I really loved it and didn't find the characters unlikable at all, and I was fully invested in the them. Rev is one of my favorite fictional characters and I loved getting his story in the follow up book.

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    1. It was a good book! It just isn't a book I want to read again, or one that resonated with me. I'm happy you liked the characters and were able to fully invest in their story! I adored Rev, so I'm looking forward to seeing his POV in the second book. I mostly disliked Juliet's attitude towards her dad and Declan. She was quick to judge, dismiss, and discredit people before getting to know them. I wish she'd been better about how she perceived others. I also didn't like how Declan was treated by his mother and stepfather, and thought the ending was a little too tidy and convenient. <3

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  7. I struggle with characters who seem petty and engage in small selfish cruelties even in their thoughts so I get why she was not winning you with this one.

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    1. Same. Juliet was so wrapped up in her grief, she didn't realize her father was hurting too. She was so critical of his appearance and actions, and I hated her a little because of it. He was doing he best, and it was clear he loved her, and she simply brushed aside his good intentions and kindness. She was also super judgmental of others, which really irked me. She didn't like people talking about her and what she was going through, but she was quick to throw the first stone. Declan was understandably angry, but his home situation needed more resolution and not a pretty bow.

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  8. I liked this one when I read it, but now I wonder how I would feel upon a reread.

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    1. Sometimes I really enjoy a book when I read it the first time, but then have a different experience with a re-read. I don't know if it's because of my age or life experiences, but sometimes a re-read makes me see an entirely different book. It's crazy and I love it.

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  9. This was the first book I read by this author and I read it because I was going to buddy read book #2 with Nicole from FYFA. I enjoyed book #2 more, but I remember being impressed with how this author creates characters. Sorry you had some issues, but not every book is for every person. Great review to state your case.

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    1. I'm really looking forward to the second book, because I really liked Rev! I have so many questions, so I hope they're answered in the next one. Kemmerer does create very realistic characters, but I couldn't relate the ones in this book. It's a bummer, but like you said, not every book is for every person. :)

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  10. I have to agree with you on this one. I felt like I should have liked it more because everyone and their mom loves it, but it just didn't do it for me. I had enjoyed some of the author's other books, but this was a bit of a miss for me as well. Great review!

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    1. We're definitely the minority, haha. I went into this book with high expectations because everyone loves it, and I've enjoyed other books by the author. Unfortunately, the characters were just too frustrating for me to like. I hated most of their choices, so it was hard for me to feel invested in their lives.

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  11. I'm sorry this book didn't work for you. All of the characters were so complex and I was engrossed with watching how their journey unfolded. I still need to read A Curse So Dark and Lonely & A Heart So Fierce and Broken by her, I'm keeping my fingers crossed I like.
    Jen @ Star-Crossed Book Blog

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    1. I'm happy this one was a win for you! The characters were complex, but I found them to be more frustrating than endearing. :) I really hope you have a chance to read ACSDAL and AHSFAB soon! I loved them both (the second more than the first). <3

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  12. We've already discussed but..I liked it a bit more than you. I didn't mind how she was with her dad. She was a jerk (about a lot of things and I never really *liked* her) but I felt like she idolized her mom so much and was trying to come to terms with that and maybe even blamed him a bit??? But she saw in the end how wrong she was.

    The Declan thing though. That made me really mad. Mad at how it was resolved. They gaslighted him and that no one interfered to help him.

    Loved reading and discussing (venting lol)with you!

    Karen @ For What It's Worth

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    1. See... how she treated her dad (especially her thoughts about him) was a big turn off for me. From what I could tell, he had always been there for her, and she was the one that pushed him away for not being "good enough." She did idolize her mom, and I think her being away from home so much made her seem less real? Human? Juliet didn't get to witness her fail or make mistakes, so she had an unrealistic version of her mother in her head.

      We're in agreement about the Declan thing. He was totally gaslighted, and definitely deserved better than he got. I can't wait for our next buddy read! <3

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  13. Sorry to hear this wasn't a great read for you. I liked this one more than you did, but I actually really preferred More Than We Can Tell, which tells Rev's story.

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    1. I'm really looking forward to Rev's book! I've heard it's better, but I also liked him more than Juliet and Declan. They were both selfish characters that constantly made bad decisions, and I just couldn't relate to them. If they'd grown more early on, I might have liked this one more.

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  14. It's difficult for me to like a book when I don't like the characters. I can see where you struggled with the unrealistic ending, and everything being wrapped up in a neat bow! Thorough Review!

    Lindy@ A Bookish Escape

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    1. Exactly! If I don't like the characters, I struggle with the story. I can like and appreciate the story, understand their motives and rationalizations, but that doesn't mean I agree with them.

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  15. The characters really do sound horrible! That kind of thing is generally a bit of a red line for me. Excellent review!

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    1. I need relatable characters! I just couldn't see myself being this judgmental and self-absorbed. Maybe if I'd lived through their traumas... but I don't know. They kept doing and saying thigs that made me cringe.

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  16. I added this to my amazon wishlist after reading Karen's thoughts on it. I haven't changed my mind on wanting to read it now I've read your thoughts but I'm braced for even more issues than I initially thought there'd be!

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    1. She did like it more than me, but I didn't hate it! There were a lot of interesting aspects to the story, but I struggle with frustrating/unlikable characters. It's a personal preference. :)

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  17. wow...that was a long review and i love that you shared so much. i don't always have to like my characters. in fact i love to hate them sometimes. lol
    sherry @ fundinmental

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    1. Haha, yeah... I'm a little long-winded when I review! I always have a lot of thoughts about a book. :) I love to hate some characters, too! It's just the frustrating, judgmental types that irk me.

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